I wasn’t strong enough. I was swayed, letting myself getting carried away, letting my own voice drowned while I was busy listening without filtering. I won’t make an excuse for myself. I was stressed and unhappy and it was nobody’s fault but my own.
Crazy diets, doing exercises I dislike, beating myself up mentally. Now that I think back, I think again, how could I do that to myself? I make effort to be kind to others yet, I wasn’t kind to myself. Doesn’t one start loving others by loving him/herself first?
Now I know better.
It was the day I stop.
The day I stop counting calories. The day I stop weighing myself. Don’t get me wrong. I still watch over my weight. But for a different reason now. I don’t go on diets. Just limiting my junk food intake, making a conscious healthier choice. It’s no longer because I want to be a size zero.
It’s because I love myself, inside out. I no longer want to look like a model. I want to look like me. I want to look and be healthy.
I can’t stop listening because I’ve got two ears but this time, I’m filtering. I now know better. I’m happy being myself. I don’t want to be anyone else.
It’s the day I stop thinking skinny always means pretty.
It’s the day I stop letting thoughts enter unfiltered.
I’ve never been happier.
Image Source: https://www.pexels.com/photo/low-section-of-man-against-sky-247851/